English Cream Dachshund
This is so accurate. At school, we literally have children who will watch our facial expressions to see if them falling is as bad as they think it might be.
CORRECT CHILD INJURY PROCEDURE:
- do not react. at the most, maybe wince and go “ooooh”
- go over to the child to assess panic level and severity of injury
- if they’re like, dying, remain calm, but they’re probably not.
- look them in the eye and ask, “you okay?” they will nod. possibly all teary-eyed. then ask, “are we gonna need to cut it off?”
- the child is thrown off. if they giggle, you’re in the money. if they do not, put a bandaid on and do some sympathetic patting. they are probably a little teary. let the sad little bug sit out for a minute. they will quickly get bored.
- works every time
The Jonas brothers suck
im coming out of the closet. i am a shirt. i haven’t been worn in months. this is exciting
sometimes you see a pun so artfully constructed you just have to stand back in awe.
bilingual my ass. you’re either heterolingual or homolingual
I just wanna s*** some d***
HOW MANY DOGS ARE YOU LOOKING TO SELL
How to spoon:
- Dick hard on the butt
- Titty in my hand
- Kiss ya neck
- Hell yeahWhat
HOW TO SPOON
- DICK HARD ON THE BUTT
- TITTY IN MY HAND
- KISS YA NECK
- H E L L Y E A H
nope im not a fully grown adult sir, no sir
SHOUT-OUT TO ALL MY FRIENDSHIPS ON TUMBLR WITH TEENAGERS
YOU ALL HAVE BETTER BLOGS THAN I DO
YOU ARE THE FUTURE AND I AM OKAY WITH THAT
‘omg I love you you are so kind and aaaaah how old are you’
‘16 how old are you?’
I think this when I’m chatting with people on here and then look at their blog description and its like ‘16/17’ and I’m like holy shit you are the same age as my baby sister what the hellllll
Yeah but for those of us who have older tumblr friends, thank.
speaking as a 17 year old, trust me when i say it means a lot when 20-somethings on tumblr treat us with respect and take us seriously because god knows no one else older than us does
Yes I second this
*sweats* This happens to me in REAL LIFE. With COSPLAY FRIENDS. IT’S SO BANANAS.
Like I can’t tell if the teenagers are just extra mature, or if I’m just extra immature.
everything about this screenshot is so in character
i love that Steve retweeted it
Danielle Brooks & Samira Wiley on Celebrity Girl Crushes
even this very young specimen of cat has already mastered the “I totally meant to do that” save.
HOW CAN YOU NOT REBLOG THIS OH MY LIFE
for chinese new year they get all these famous actors and comedians together and they do a lil show and one of the comedians was like “i was in a hotel in america once and there was a mouse in my room so i called reception except i forgot the english word for mouse so instead i said ‘you know tom and jerry? jerry is here’
jerry is here